A Recent Correspondance

Dear Mr. Snicket,

My name is Daniel. I am your number one fan. I'm on book number eleven and I just love your books. Will you ever be coming to Arkansas for a book tour? I really hope so. Maybe I can get my books signed. I have all of them except eleven and twelve. My favorite character would have to be Sunny. Just the way she talks makes me laugh. My sister told me your real name is Daniel Handler. That's awesome! We have the same name. Are the Baudelaires real? Why do you act so mysterious? Please answer.

From your number one fan:

Daniel Burley

Dear Writer,

Thank you for your message. When you wrote it, you probably thought you might receive a reply from Lemony Snicket. You were almost wrong.

I’m sorry to tell you that a letter from Mr. Snicket could put you in terrible danger. For instance, Mr. Snicket wrote a number of letters to a woman named Beatrice, the most alarming of which are contained within the book The Beatrice Letters, and she subsequently died a sad, horrible, awful death that still plagues me to this day. This is an extreme case, of course, but you can see why you would never want to receive a letter signed by Mr. Snicket.

There is at least one thing more dangerous than a letter by Mr. Snicket, however, and that is a book by him. Each of the books in A Series of Unfortunate Events have been more dreadful than the last. The End, the thirteenth and final book in the series, is the most upsetting of all.

Sadly, your message to Lemony Snicket suggests that you may have already read one or several of his books. While I’m sure he is somewhat grateful for your interest in the Baudelaire case, hopefully it is not too late for you to stop before The End. Wouldn’t you prefer to read something else?

With all due respect,

Anonymous Representative
HarperCollins Publishers
Department of Vital Fan Disclosure

The Underlander Series by Suzzanne Collins

These books are the greatest series I have ever read because of the people in them. Gregor, Boots, Vykus, and Luxa are all very great people. Vykus and Luxa are humans but they are also Underlanders, a human who lives under the ground. There are fifteen sections to the Underland: the Dead Land, Regalia, Spinners Land, Crawlers Land, Flyers Land, the Fount, but the rest of them are tunnels or spaces in between that no one has claimed. There are five books in the series and I have read two of them: Gregor the Overlander and Gregor and the Prophecy of Bane. There are three more books in the series.

I recommend these books to all who enjoy a great fantasy series and books with prophecies.

-- Caleb Burley

German Boy by Daniel

"You will not get away with this, Dr. Swiss-n-Cheese." said German Boy.

"Of course I will! I just need some four-ply tissues. I have a runny nose because it's winter," said Dr. Swiss-n-Cheese.

"I will use my oompa powers to destroy your ray gun! Oompa Oompa Oompa-PA!!!!!" German Boy used his sonic-scream powers!

"OW! You hurt my ears! Want some swiss cheese?" said Dr. Swiss-n-Cheese.

"I'll have some when you're behind BARS!" said German Boy. "I'll use my pig power ray gun."

"The one that shoots mud in the shape of a pig? YAH -- that one's not so scary."

"Then I'll use my cow udders of DOOM!"

"Oh, I forgot about that one! But who's afraid of milk? OH NO!!! I forgot I'm lactose intolerant! AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"Ha! I have found a way to defeat you! Milk powers ACTIVATE!!" shrieked German Boy with glee.

Dr. Swiss-n-Cheese involuntarily drank the milk and was immediately doubled over in horrendous gas pains. The police came, slapped him into handcuffs, and carted him off to jail.

"Holy Cow it stinks in here! But justice has won," said a triumphant German Boy.

THE END

I wanna type it

MOM! You know what I mean! AAAHHHH!! (hands covering face)

STOP TYPING WHAT I'M SAYING!

WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?

WHY DOES CALEB GET TO? aaaaaahhhhh -- I give up.

Don't post this.

Do not put my name on it either.

Do not -- I repeat -- do not put this on our blog.

Ben 10 Alien Force/Ben Ten by Daniel

Hello! I'm a German fellow. Oompa, oompa, oompa-pa. Where is Toto? I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, 'cuz we're in space!

(insert lots of giggles here)

Ben 10 Alien and Ben 10 are about a boy who finds a mysterious watch. At first, he thinks it's a Japanese watch but once he presses down to set it he turns into a person made of lava, rock, and fire. This is Heat-Blast. He is good. He is not German. (More giggles) This is what happens in Ben 10's first episode.

Ben 10 Alien Force is about him when he is 15. He was 10 in Ben 10. My favorite episode is when an alien of his goes haywire. It eats metal and attacks people. It turns out that every 80 years this alien species has babies. Ben had babies. Oompa, oompa, oompa-pa. (Lots more giggles)

The End.

The Battle of the Labyrinth by Caleb

WHOA! I cannot believe this book! It is totally awesome! So far, they have gone on a perilous journey into the labyrinth, a huge maze under ground that used to be used to hold monsters -- including minotaurs! This is the fourth book of the Percy Jackson series. The other three are The Lightening Thief, The Sea of Monsters, and The Titans' Curse. Rick Riordan is working on a fifth where Thalia returns. Thalia is a hunter of Artemis, the goddess of the hunt and the moon. She is also a daughter of Zeus. Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase are so clueless in the labyrinth, they're having to go the old-fashioned way: getting help from a mortal named Rachel Elizabeth Dare. The thing that is special about Rachel is that she can see through The Mist, a magical shield that disguises monsters from their true identity and true form.

I recommend this series to all who like Greek mythology.

Meet Sunny

Have you ever seen or read A Series of Unfortunate Events? I'm on the seventh book, The Vile Village. I would like to tell you about one of my favorite characters. Her name is Sunny.

She is only an infant and she loves to bite. She bit a very harmless snake, climbed up an elevator shaft with her teeth, and let me tell you -- she has teeth sharper than fangs.

She talks like a baby would. She says stuff like, "neebdes," which meant something like, "could you explain that a bit more?" and "azzator!" which meant, "don't worry -- your secret is safe with us."

If you haven't read these books, I hope some day you will.

-- Daniel Burley or some people call me Bookworm, Shirley, or Danielle. (Don't ask me why they call me that. Except for Bookworm.)

My First Time at the Movies with a Girl (other than my mom)

I can't believe it! One of my best friends just moved, but right before she did we went to the movies together. We went to see Space Chimps at the Rialto. Man, it was the greatest movie I've ever seen. Here's the cool thing: we got front row seats and her dad left us alone. Right before she moved we had a big party for her at school. We made her this really cool shirt with the class's picture on it and everybody was in it except for Devon.

And that's all I have to say.

See you at my next post,

Caleb Burley aka "oldest boy in the house other than dad."

This is from Daniel

Hmm.

Let me think.

Well, this is what happened to me Monday. My best friend Ciaran came to eat lunch with me. He had moved to Bentonville and at recess people kept on wanting to meet him so we had to run away. I just wanted to inform you of that.

We will add random things on our blog.

Our first post

From Daniel:

People -- I know this has my mom's name, but it's our blog, so don't think this is my mom's second blog. Think that it's my brother's and mine. Enjoy reading.

From Caleb:

What's up people of the world? If you don't like it, never read it again. See ya at our next post.